wrds

It’s been almost a decade since I’ve seen you irl.
Our random electronic talks don’t really count, do they?
I often wonder about you… oh I don’t know…once every full moon – how sad, it used to be once every second.
I wonder what you are doing now, and if you are happy.
And if the thoughts that you think include me sometimes.
You know, strangely enough I think they do.
I always wanted you to be happy; I have the feeling that you ended up pretending to be.
I found a picture of you on the net today…google can do magic sometimes. It was a strange picture, like you were after a traffic accident.
For a moment there, my heart died. I wanted to call you there and then. Then I looked at the date – the picture was old and you are obviously fine.
I am sitting here musing about the fact that my heart jumped in my throat from fear that something happened to you. Whom I haven’t seen for ten years.
Like all those letters I wrote to you, let me finish this one, which you will never read, with a song.

I wanna stand up, I wanna let go
You know, you know - no you don't, you don't
I wanna shine on, in the hearts of men
I want a meaning from the back of my broken hand

Another headache, another heart breaks
I'm so much older than I can take
And my affection, well it comes and goes
I need direction to perfection..
(I got soul but I'm not a soldier)

Roam